Can you imagine how Manhattan might smell if a 500-foot-tall version of Post Malone showed up and plunked his ass down in the middle of Times Square? The video for the new song “Writing On The Wall” raises fascinating philosophical questions like this.
“Writing On The Wall,” French Montana’s new single, is a sort of superstar summit. It’s got verses from French and Cardi B. It’s got a hook from Post Malone. And it’s got production and songwriting assistance from Rvssian, the Jamaican polyglot singer and producer, who must’ve had to pull some serious strings to get a feature credit on the song. Rvssian co-produced the song with Post Malone collaborators Louis Bell — the man currently making his bid to become the new Max Martin — and Cashio. It sounds more like a Post Malone song than a French Montana one, and it continues French’s long streak of being the least interesting thing on his own singles.
But the pretty-forgettable song — which Cardi, as you probably don’t need me to tell you, handily steals — mostly works as an excuse for the video, which is ridiculous. The clip, which French co-directed with Myles Whittingham, features French, Post, and Cardi as towering, kaiju-sized monsters trudging their way through New York streets. All of them take Manhattan, and French and Cardi also make their way to the Bronx, the borough that both have called home. (This song would probably be cooler if it was just French and Cardi talking BX shit and not involving Syracuse/Dallas native and current Utah survivalist-compound owner Post Malone.) Rvssian does not get the CGI-giant treatment, so he must not have that much pull. Watch the “Writing On The Wall” video below.
So let’s discuss this. The crowd in Times Square seems happy when the colossal-sized French Montana shows up, which requires even more suspension of disbelief than the mere existence of a 500-foot French Montana. I don’t care how much these people might like a particular rapper. New York is a densely populated metropolitan era. If the supersized French even sets foot on the island of Manhattan, thousands of people are dying. Let’s be realistic here.
Also of note: Cardi! She kicks a helicopter out of the sky while wearing lingerie, bounces her ass on a project rooftop, and plants a high heel right in the middle of Yankee Stadium. Truly a command performance. She’s the King Ghidorah of the “Writing On The Wall” video.
Between this and Lana Del Rey’s “Doin’ Time” video, we could be seeing the dawn of a new golden age of pop-star-as-giant-monster videos. I support it; I have ever since Snoop came through and knocked down the towers.
“Writing On The Wall” is out now on the streaming services, and French has a new album called Montana coming in November.